Gluten-Free 2+ Months!

I am beyond thrilled to report that I have been GF for a little over 2 months. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. My mind and body are telling me the hardest part is over. I have broken the tumultuous pattern of tapering on and off with my gluten habit-filled relapses. The greatest part is I that I no longer feel like I am struggling to make the right decisions. I have the support from my family, my partner, and my friends. Most importantly, I have the support of myself. I no longer need to turn to others to help me say 'no' to the delicious slice of carrot cake at the table.

My physical self is feeling wonderful. My stomach aches and pains have nearly disappeared, I have more strength than I did, few headaches, the itchy patches of skin that I once had have diminished, and my overall energy level has immensely increased. On an interesting note, my emotional well-being has taken a change for the better. Somehow by deleting gluten, I have gained a sufficient amount of self awareness and confidence. People wouldn't guess that I am the self conscious type, but don't be fooled, we all have our doubts. My doubts arrive during the times I ate enormous amounts of gluten. Especially, while hiding behind pasta and bread products (my classic go to comfort foods). My emotional messiness was only exacerbated by the gluten.

I am particularly appreciative of my strength in making healthy food choices now because next week is Thanksgiving and therefore starts the holiday feasting. I would be dishonest if I said I wasn't a little worried about making the right choices, but I spoke to my family and assured them I cannot go back to eating gluten. Of course, they are very supportive. My family has seen the damage that gluten has caused first hand. They were with me in the emergency room visits and hospital stays. They are amazed that it came to an end by simply cutting gluten from my diet.

Once again this has proven to be an interesting and life changing process. Each new step reveals something new.Speaking of new, I have been recording recipes that I am going to share soon. What is everyone else doing for Thanksgiving? Anyone have a delicious gluten free recipe or tip? Please, feel free to share.

1 month

I am happy to report I have not had an ounce of gluten for 1 month. I have never made it this far and I am certainly proud. I am still experiencing some of the symptoms including the cravings, but overall, I feel so good.

Another process of detoxing is unfolding. However, this is more of a mental detox. A couple weeks ago I read an article about the physical damage stress has on the body. I am currently taking a break from being a therapist so I really do not have much stress on my shoulders. I gain my income from being a nanny for several different families and I love it. The article really had me thinking about faulty or unhealthy relationships in our lives (you know, the ones we put an exorbitant amount of effort into and receive nothing in return) are a source of stress. How appropriate would it be for me to rid those stress producing non-reciprocated relationships in my life? Very appropriate. My objective throughout this entire process is to embrace a healthier lifestyle.  Sometimes we have to release the unhealthy relationships (no matter how hard it may be) around us. From now on I am replacing stressful relationships by surrounding myself with wonderful, meaningful, and authentic relationships full of love and laughter. The truth is, this process wasn't hard once I realized what I wanted and I am truly blessed to have such amazing relationships all around me. So far, just like the gluten detox, there are periods of grief and some cravings, and  the impulse to try and 'fix' the relationship are there. In order to rid stress and embrace a healthier self, I cannot be the 'fixer' anymore. It was a revelation to accept this and I encourage others to explore this concept as well.

Others who have become gluten-free or who are detoxifying from other food allergies know the power of transformation. Once you begin to feel better, you want to change something else to increase the goodness. Taking a step further and eliminating stressful relationships (especially the ones taking an emotional and physical toll on the body) was another way for me to embrace the new me. I am curious about other strategies people use to handle major sources of stress; especially, during the detox process. What do you do in times of stress? What is your vice? Whatever it may be, I hope you find yourself in a healthier state of mind once you let it go.

Milestone: Two weeks + 2

16 days.

I have been gluten-free for 16 days. This is a new record. The longest time I have stuck with the GF lifestyle is 14 days. I have made it over the second hump. I have changed up my diet a lot in the last 16 days. I even tried to do something pretty drastic and go on a juice fast for 15 days. We recently watched a documentary called, "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead." It was truly an inspiration to become healthy. I do want to lose weight but my primary goal is to be healthy. I thought I could accomplish both in a fairly short amount of time by juicing. After two days of juicing, I was having stomach pains and I was feeling pretty sick. After consulting with some close friends and reading up on people who juice and have gluten allergies/Celiac Disease I realized I should have taken the proper precautions because I have such a sensitive stomach. People who suffer from gluten often have a lot of stomach issues. It turns out the acid in juice can further irritate the stomach and intestines if the digestion system has not healed. As my friends told me this and I researched the ramifications of it, I decided to stop. I still think juicing is a good way to detox and train your body to crave healthy foods, but I am going to wait months (it can take the body 6-12 months of detoxing from gluten to completely heal) before attempting to do so again.

Although it can take up to a year or more for the body to rebuild itself, it is not uncommon to for people to feel immediate changes once they stop eating gluten. I have felt an immediate change in my body. However, as you have read, I have gone through ups and downs. I have felt less pressure and no pain in my stomach after eating but have felt ultra itchy at times. I have never felt this energized throughout the day and emotional at the end of others. Every time I have a craving for a giant roll or some gluten-filled pasta I remember the pain I feel when I consume it. The pain is a combination of all the worst stomach aches I have had all at once, plus headaches, plus the itchiness, plus the grumpiness, plus the depression etc... So, I can handle feeling each of these symptoms as they are mostly happening once at a time and on their way out of my body.

Cheers to what has been accomplished and for more days, months, years to come!

Day 10: Itchy Business

Whew, I promise my ambition for this blog is not to complain all the time. However, right now I am detoxing and I am finding it hard to talk about the pros of going gluten-free. I know there will be tons of benefits in the end, but the first couple weeks are the hardest. I think it's worse for me this time because I have been ultra-ubber picky with everything. I have made sure that absolutely not even a morsel of gluten has found its way into my stomach. I have made almost all our meals from scratch, and what wasn't made from scratch, the ingredients have been carefully examined. *A little confession: Previous times that I cut out gluten, I held on tight to my beloved ranch dressing (I was too afraid to read the label). Essentially, I was still fulfilling my body with small amounts of gluten. I have quickly learned that no matter the portion of gluten, it hurts me. Badly.

As I reported earlier in the week, things are mostly good but I was experiencing some skin crawling itchiness. That is still happening, only worse. For the last couple of days I didn't want to be physically touched by anyone. This is confusing to me because I am cuddle-monster. I love physical touch, giving and receiving hugs etc...Bottom line, it is not like me to not want to show affection in a physical way.

I have researched what detoxing looks like for lots of people, and to be honest, it's not too much different to how I feel when I eat gluten. I felt so uncomfortable yesterday that I was beginning to think some gluten somehow found its way into my dinner (which would have really surprised me!). So, I am ready for this emotional and physical roller coaster to end. On the other hand, it's been powerful to witness the healing power of the body. Not only do I feel the internal changes, but I am seeing physical changes.Yeah, I may have some red dry patches of skin, pimples, and itchiness, but I am glad that something is happening and my body is doing whatever it can to kick gluten out!

In the mean time, I think I need a good gf lotion. Any ideas?

Milestone: One Week

It has officially been 7 full days of being gluten-free. I can't believe the positive changes that have occurred already. One of the biggest and best feelings in the world happened on day 4 when I didn't have any trance of a stomach ache. Also, I have had completely "normal" trips to the bathroom, if you can catch my drift. Another benefit (huge deal), is that after I eat, I actually feel full and satisfied. This hasn't happened in years. I am always hungry. It is common for me to feel like I am nearly starving 30 minutes after a meal. It makes perfect sense to feel this way when the body isn't absorbing the proper nutrients, which is exactly what was happening when I ate a meal full of gluten.

Even though I am feelings great, the first 3 days were somewhat of an obstacle. I felt hungry, cranky, emotional, nauseated, my face started breaking out, and I was feeling a lot of fatigue. Every time I felt the urge to bite into a piece of bread (to fulfill the cravings I had), I remembered that I wouldn't feel this way forever. I checked-in with friends who assured me I would feel better soon. Their support was paramount to me not giving in this time. For the sake of being healthy I owed it to myself not to give in. I am truly a gluten-free giddy and lucky girl.

Overall, I wouldn't say I have completely detoxed. My face is still breaking out and I have a little bit of cravings at really weird moments (like in the middle of the night). If anyone can explain that to me, I would love to hear it. Also, for some reason I have been pretty itchy. Even down to the insides of my ears. It could be the allergens in the air with the seasonal change approaching. However, this type of itchiness is different. It feels like it's internal. It is kind of like my skin is crawling. At any rate, I would take these side effects any day over poisoning my body with gluten.

On Track

Phew, my last post was a doosey. I will make sure to keep this one a little more brief. As I mentioned before, my family and friends have always provided me with immense support. Last weekend I was sort of breaking down to a close friend of mine. Since she has moved here, she has been on her own journey of healing and healthy transformation (you can follow her blog here). She is vegan and very aware of the things she puts into her body. She gave me a list of resources and together we looked at some books. I settled on purchasing one of her favorite books What to Eat  and another book I found on my own The G Free Diet: A Gluten-Free Survival Guide. My nose have been buried in these books all week long and they have touched  base on my issues and confusion around food. For example, how can I trust food when all it does is make me upset, both physically and mentally? Marion Nestle (What to Eat) validated the state of overwhelm I often encounter in the grocery store. Regardless of you relationship with foods What to Eat is a phenomenal book that dives into the food politics of this country. The G Free Diet is not only good for those who are gluten-free, but helpful for parents and partners who live with others who are gluten-free.

Show on the Road

This hasn't been my first rodeo in the attempt to document my gluten-free lifestyle. In fact, my on again-off again blogging could be a metaphor for my g-free lifestyle thus far. This is my final whole-hearted attempt to completely commit to living gluten-free. My final attempt meaning that I will succeed this time around.

My stomach troubles started about 5 years ago. I was overweight (as I have been most of my life) and became close with a friend who's mother worked at Weight Watchers. For the summer, I decided to join the program and within 3 months, I lost about 36 pounds. I gave up sugar (including my beloved soda), and most fats. The only fats I consumed were within a small portion range and were considered "treats". I lost a lot of weight and I felt good. I was getting a lot of attention because my body was changing, and I won't lie and say I didn't use the attention as fuel to lose more. I also started taking birth control for the first time and talked to the doctor about the risks of gaining weight. My gynecologist suggested for me to try a new product, "YAZ" which was an adaptation of Yasmin with different hormones. Normally, I'm not okay with being the guinea pig for medications (or pretty much anything) but I was sold on the fact that YAZ functioned as a diuretic. A diuretic forces you to pee out all the water your body may be retaining because of birth control. Perfect, I thought. 

At the end of the 3 month diet, I woke up one Sunday morning in excruciating pain in my abdominal area. I was dizzy, disoriented, and in extreme discomfort. It was hard to breathe because when I did, the pain radiated through my back. I woke up my parents and they immediately took me to the emergency room. The ER visit turned into 5 day stay in the hospital as I was put on IV's and medication to eliminate the infection (as they called it) in my tummy. All blood tests pointed to the gallbladder. I had elevated liver enzymes which indicates there is an infection somewhere in the body. We were just missing the one final criterion that would approve me for gallbladder surgery. However, I did not have this and the insurance company did not aprove me for surgery. My diagnosis was wishy-washy and I was eventually sent home with a prescription for Protonix (an anti-acid drug). 

However, another complication arose while I was in the hospital.  Throughout my visit, the anti nausea medication the nurses administered by IV was causing great discomfort. I complained about this and the nurses assured me that I was "fine" and that my arms were just "sensitive" to the medication.The first night I was home, my right arm was SO swollen that you couldn't see my knuckles and my left arm was quickly on it's way to match. The incorrect placement of the IV caused flabitious in my arms, which is a violent infection. My mom called our PCP immediately (as he was also a family friend) and he prescribed one of the harshest antibiotics known. The antibiotics knocked the infection out of my system, but had several side affects. Abdominal discomfort was one of them and I couldn't keep anything down for a week. I finished all medications and although weak, I went back to school (several states away) for the year. 

I am not telling you this to be TMI or gross you out, but because these traumatic events were the beginning of 5 years of gastrointestinal issues. In the book I am reading by Elizabeth Hasselback called, "The G Free Diet: A Gluten Free Survival Guide," she writes that it is common for Celiacs disease and gluten sensitivities to appear in early adulthood. Those who have the gene that carries Celiacs can go through their whole life without having any symptoms. Some of them don't ever experience any discomfort; however, a huge amount of us do and it's usually caused by a traumatic event. That summer, I started a new extreme diet, birth control (foreign substance into my body), became sick, and had to take extreme measures to keep my arms from being amputated (which is what would have happened if I did not take the harsh antibiotic).  I forgot to mention, in the very beginning of that summer, I was also in a car accident. All of these events could have triggered the gastrointestinal complications that I experienced from then on. 

Fast forwarding about 2 years and many hospital visits later (for the same extreme discomfort), I suffered a massive gallbladder attack and was rushed to the ER by my partner, Daniel. I was lethargic, disoriented, in pain, and yellow. I arrived at the ER and the doctor actually yelled at me for not coming in sooner and that I have a gallstone. I was too sick to say, 'Well, can you blame me? How many times have I come here and been sent home with a bottle of vicodin and anti-acids?' I would need 2 surgeries that week. One to remove my gallstone which was blocking my liver from functioning (also causing the jaundice), and the second was to remove my gallbladder. Although these are two invasive surgeries, I was relieved. I couldn't wait to have my gallbladder removed because was in pain for far too long and it's impossible to feel that kind of pain without a gallbladder, right? Wrong.

The surgeries went smoothly and I was out of the hospital after 6 days. For a long time, I felt great. Then, after a couple months and returning to my normal college diet (macaroni and cheese, pasta, pasta, pasta), I started getting sick again. Fast forward another year and I'm back in the ER confused that I have more abdominal pain. I felt sick and embarrassed. I was done. Clearly, I didn't get any answers from the doctors who were just as confused as I was. Finally, one ER doctor suggested that I get tested for food allergies. During the same time, my Uncle was discussing all of his food allergies with my mom and I got into contact with him. His struggles were very similar to mine and his answer was eliminating all gluten, wheat, dairy, and processed foods from his diet. 10 years later and he was feeling great. I felt inspired to move towards this dramatic lifestyle change.  

I begin to thoroughly research food allergies and the one that popped up the most next to dairy, nuts etc...was gluten. I thought to myself, 'what in the heck is gluten?' After reading about it, I was convinced I had either Celiacs Disease or sensitivity to gluten. My suspicion was confirmed the first time I cut it out. I felt great! I was losing weight, energized, and most importantly I had no stomach issues. 

So, the last two years have been filled with ups and downs, success, trial and error, and failure too. I couldn't help diving into that large bowl of pasta (the ultimate comfort food for me) at the end of a long day. However, I am realizing that I COULD help it and I WILL help it! After talking to my family and friends about the lifestyle changes I need to make to completely eliminate gluten from my diet, I have the support and community to encourage me to be successful this time around. I know I can do this and I have been sick for too long. I am beyond ready for food to be my friend again.

I created this blog as testimony to my transformation and process. So far, I have been officially gluten-free for 6 days. It was a difficult transition, but I woke this morning feeling energized and excited to dive into all my gluten-free cookbooks.